I am feeling triggered and all of a sudden, I am 10 and stressed about being un-friended and deserted. Although I am well in adulthood, the loss of a friend is making me regress and brings back all those anxious and ruminative feelings. I'm finding myself obsessively thinking about it and I feel that tight feeling in my chest. I feel so fucking anxious and like something is stuck in my throat. It's like, god forbid someone doesn't like me and want to be my friend. It really is. Ever since I was little, I have placed such emphasis on friendships or rather, to be liked. I have always tried so much to be liked and have secretly felt pleasure and joy when I was able to make new friends. I think it stems from my early childhood and the struggle with fitting in or being accepted at my first school. There I was bullied and often left alone. I'm psychoanalysing myself but here is where I feel I developed these unhealthy schemas or cognition. I wanted so badly to not feel tha...